across an ocean of tears
by Kairaita
Summary: And we will meet at the ends of the sea. - Ur, Urtear, featuring Gray and Lyon.


_~across an ocean of tears~_

"_Dearest, most beautiful, most beloved daughter of mine…"_

* * *

All her life, Ur has been sure of each and every one of her decisions.

She was sure that she wanted to leave home to seek out the greatest magic teacher ever on her own.

She was sure that she wanted to be one with ice; to use it, to embrace it, to feel it in every cell of her body, to know it better than she knew herself.

She was sure that the man she met and fell for at first sight would be a wonderful companion, but a terrible father, and married him anyway.

She was sure that her short-lived husband's departure was for the better.

She was sure that she wanted to keep the little spark of life she discovered inside her.

But when her tiny daughter - her sweet baby girl, _her tear_ - is finally born, light fills her heart with hope and wishes and a bright future and Ur isn't sure of anything anymore.

And she loves it.

* * *

"_Today was your first day in the world. You were surprisingly quiet when the nurses were cleaning you up. The ones who don't cry will grow up with an ear for listening, my mother always said. I don't believe much in those old sayings, but I would be pleasantly surprised if it becomes true."_

* * *

She isn't sure how to change diapers at first. She isn't sure how to feed the baby at first. She isn't sure how long the baby should sleep. She isn't sure how to soothe little Urtear when she's crying, how to whisper comfortingly until her baby's pinched face relaxes in content bliss.

In the grand scheme of things though, these are just insignificant little bumps on the road and can be overcome through mistakes and experiences. There are more important things Ur can think that she isn't sure of.

She isn't sure how she could be blessed with such a miracle. She isn't sure what she _did_ to deserve such a miracle. She isn't sure how it's possible to be so happy – so, _so _happy. She isn't sure what kind of person, what kind of woman her little miracle will grow up into, so Ur hugs Urtear close and swears to dedicate this life of hers to her daughter.

But most of all, Ur isn't sure what to do about Urtear's overwhelming magical power, and what it will do to her wellbeing. It fluctuates, unstable. There are good days, and bad days, and it's going to build up eventually.

This child is proof that she lived, and Ur would rather die than see that life be snuffed out.

* * *

"_I'm watching over you as I write right now, and wondering how something, how _someone_ can be so perfect. You have ten little toes that wiggle around, and ten little fingers that can grip my own. You laughed and smiled peacefully at me when I held you in my arms today."_

* * *

It breaks Ur to have to leave her daughter at the hospital.

But this time the fever is getting worse and there are some things she can't do in the safety of their cozy, snow-covered home. And if she only has to be separated from her little girl for a day or two in exchange for a lifetime with her, then so be it.

When Ur returns and they tell her Urtear is dead, she has never felt such cold despair.

Her desperate pleas for them to give her daughter, to give _her Urtear _back fall on deaf ears, and if she thought she was broken before, Ur positively _shatters_.

* * *

"_Far be it for me to tell you what sort of magic to learn, if any, but I do hope that you will at least consider taking after me. I can show you just how much freedom there is in this world."_

_I want you to know…"_

* * *

In the period of time she calls 'After', Ur stumbles through the days in a haze.

She closes off that room. She shoves the pretty dresses and things to the bottom of a dark closet. She slams the little bowls and cups angrily into the garbage can.

She sits in her armchair - close to the fire because she's been so _cold_ lately for some strange reason, considering she's stripped down to undergarments in blizzards before – and stares blankly out the window, watching snowflakes drift lazily down to earth from the heavens.

She feels. Lost.

Days, weeks, months, maybe years, pass, not that Ur really keeps track because the scenery always looks the same out here and she hasn't looked at a calendar in town for so long. It would be a lie to say that it's getting better, because there is no 'getting better' from something like this, from the empty spaces, tears, and silence. But she is… coping.

And one day, there is a little boy with tufted silvery hair and a contagiously wide smile on his face knocking at her door.

* * *

"…_I want you to know that all those things I mentioned are what I'm trying to protect. _You_ are my happiness. I will be your defender, confidant, supporter, anything you will ever need or want me to be. _**I will go to war for you.**_"_

* * *

Not even two months after Lyon, Ur finds Gray amidst death and destruction, with a look in his eyes she doesn't like.

He and Lyon are like night and day, and almost act it too. Gray is quiet, sullen, and moodier than any eight-year-old should ever be. Lyon is chatty, bubbly, and cheerfully optimistic in the way of a dreamer.

Ur's not sure why she takes them in, really, until Lyon makes an assumption he never should have and she realizes.

She took them in because Lyon has a light blinding him that needs to be dimmed, and Gray has a darkness consuming him that needs to be sealed.

And honestly, every word she speaks is truth. The idea that those two boys, _her_ two boys, are replacements for her daughter has never, ever crossed her mind until Lyon brought it up. There is simply no comparison.

It's times like this when she uses the rusty key to open her little girl's room. She dusts off the furniture, sweeps away the mothballs in the closet, and refolds the clothes, ignoring the warm lines of salt trailing down her cheeks.

* * *

"_I feel so very lucky to have you in my life, no matter what path you choose to take. You should know that our home is a place of safety, and love, and there will always be a place here for you."_

* * *

The three of them are training outside. Lyon and Gray are quick learners, despite how troublesome they are.

Somewhere along the line, Ur thinks that just as much as she has saved them, these two boys have saved her as well.

She laughs at Gray and Lyon's antics, watching her students fight it out like so many times before. Something catches her eyes on the hill and Ur whips her head up, squinting through the thick snow.

There is nothing there.

Ur turns back to her two boys, and suddenly feels like she has lost something very important.

* * *

"_You have a bright future before you, full of infinite possibilities. I hope you can still read these words through the wet spots. I'm sorry; I can't stop my tears from overflowing when I think about how much I will look forward to watching you grow up._

_Just remember that wherever you go, and whatever you might do…"_

* * *

Deliora is an obstacle.

The monster is an obstacle to Gray, to Gray's happiness, and that means it's an obstacle to her happiness too.

That's why she's doing this. She can't—she _won't_ let either of them die. Not like this.

Her boys. Her two boys. She is so proud of them. She was so proud to take them in, to raise them, to teach them, to watch them grow up with a chance her daughter never had.

As she pours herself into Iced Shell, swears Gray to a promise, and casts one more, one last fond look back, Ur smiles and whispers a name, allowing it to be the last thing that falls from her lips.

* * *

"…_**I will always love you, Urtear."**_

* * *

In the snow, in a tiny room of an empty, dark, decaying house, there is a woman who stands by an overturned drawer. Delicate fingers grip a faded, yellowing paper, and her lips are pressed together tightly in a hard line.

She remembers only sharp, clear fragments _(of fever-heated cheeks cooling against her neck, of a back retreating into darkness, of laugh lines blossoming across her face for two brats who didn't deserve it) _of the woman who dared call herself 'mother'.

Urtear rips the letter – and what's left of her heart – in two, throwing the pieces out to the blizzard wind.

"Liar."

.

.

.

* * *

**A/N: **Because Ur is a wonderful, wonderful person, and she needs some sort of tribute. And at exactly 1,500 words, this is my submission for the second challenge of Mrs. HopeEstheim's Fairy Tail Writing Challenges. I loved writing this, I really did. When the prompt actually went up, I immediately wanted to do a cute Connell family one with Bisca and Alzack telling Asuka fairy tales with the guild members in it. But then I had an idea for an angsty Laxus-Makarov-Ivan one. And then Ur and Ultear came in and stole the spotlight, not that I'm really complaining. I still have ideas for the other two floating around, and maybe they'll be full stories one day.

To me though, the hardest part wasn't actually writing this, it was about deciding whether to stay consistent with the naming theme (Ur and Urtear, or Ul and Ultear), or use the official spellings, which look better in my opinion despite the fact I wanted the naming to be accurate (I generally use Ur and Ultear, despite everything). Seriously, you have no idea how agonizing it was going for one choice and second-guessing myself every other sentence. If anyone reviews, I would really appreciate it if you left your personal opinion on how you would write it so I can get a majority vote on whether to change it or not. And again, good luck to everyone else still writing their submissions!


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